Ebb and Flow | Musings

Lately it seems like my life is full of crazy twists and turns. A plethora of highs met with extreme lows. The tides of my life are ebbing and flowing in strange unnatural patterns which is taking a considerable toll. A lot has happened in the past month or so. First I got accepted into a creative writing course at NMIT, and I’m eligible for fees free and some other government grants. Which makes it a lot easier for me, financially at least. I’m not enjoying the paper work though. Then something happened that shouldn’t have. My sweet darling rabbit Penelope passed away. There was nothing we could do. She was only three months old. There is no way I can describe it besides my own heart being ripped into. I had lost my child. Lover held me while I cried for hours.


Our landlady keeps metaphorically fucking us. It’s to much of a god damn saga to be bothered digging into the details, so I’ll leave it at that. But Lover and I got to go on holiday, which was truly wonderful. We saw so many delightful things and visited so many extraordinary places. It really was worth every penny. Except maybe the ten dollar bus fee from the airport. There was so much laughter, and my face could not stop smiling the whole first day we were there. I cannot adequately express how completely enamored I am with my Lover. If he doesn’t marry me one day, I will be truly put out.


The deadline to submit all my paperwork for my study is looming ever closer, and we may be kicked out of our house. I don’t know yet. But it is rather safe to say, that there has been a strange pulling of the tides in my life. I pray there is something better at the end of all of this. That this is for the better, and that we are not moving forward just to be knocked on our asses once again. We need to take a step forwards.

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